What Is Enough?

After a year of being married, Wade and I bought our first house. It was fifteen years older than I was and life hadn’t been as kind to it. But we had plans and a little bit of money plus support from family to pull down wallpaper, paneling, carpet, and paint and refinish hardwood floors.

Even after all our work, there were areas we couldn’t afford to fix such as the kitchen and the one bathroom. We didn’t have money for furniture either so we had one sofa which seated three and a glider rocker. If we brought the four squeaky, old antique caned chairs from the kitchen table into the living room, then we had room for four more.

But you know what, I struggled. I struggled with the old linoleum in the kitchen with its years’ worth of ground-in dirt that would not come out no matter how hard I tried to get it clean. The gummy buildup of grime on the original thin wood cabinets in the kitchen would not come off no matter what mixture of cleaners I tried. (This was BEFORE Pinterest, or I would have been able to solve both issues. 😉)

I’m sure there was a list of other things I could have pointed out during that time, but those things come to mind first. It didn’t take me long to realize my problem. Discontentment. I wasn’t happy with what I had.

Here I was, a mere twenty years old, married to a hardworking man who paid for my school and was giving me the privilege of being a stay-at-home-wife as I went to college full time and made our 988 square foot house a “home.” Obviously, Satan didn’t have a hard time making me lose focus. Making my pride become an issue in life. That is the root of discontent; we think we deserve better.

For a few years I had moments of embarrassment when someone came over, because my house didn’t look the way I thought it should. (See my similar struggles in When My Strengths are My Weaknesses.) This is still a struggle at times although the discontent has moved to other areas of my life. This is a struggle for ALL of us.

Guess who started this continual cycle of “I want more!”? Adam and Eve. Think about it. They were perfect people living in a perfect world. What more could they have wanted? Oh yeah, the fruit from THAT ONE tree (Genesis 2:17). Satan disguised as a serpent was quick to point out to them what they were missing as he does us (Genesis 3:1-6).

Sarah was another in the Bible who lived in discontentment for many years. Like me during those early years of marriage, she was blind to all she had in life. She was beautiful, wealthy, and she had a husband (Abraham) who loved her. A husband’s love wasn’t common during this time and in this culture. Yet she wanted children. It was probably something she thought about every day. She may have seen her neighbors or family with their children and was constantly reminded of what she didn’t have.

That happens to us a bigger way with the daily bombardment of social media which reminds each of us how imperfect our lives are and how much we really don’t have. Isn’t that the way it makes us feel at times? Or is it only me?

“We didn’t get to go on vacation or we went on vacation but not for a whole week like they did or a cruise or the beach or another country…His kids make good grades and never do anything wrong, it must be nice…They have good jobs and have more money to be able to have more…Their marriage must be perfect…He drives a new car, and it must be nice when I can’t even afford to fix my air conditioning…They get together all the time and I’m never invited…She just had her third baby, and I can’t even get pregnant…OR she just had her third baby and look how good her body looks…”

“There will always be someone who has a little more than you and there will always be someone who has a little less than you. Stop comparing. Start embracing where you’re at right now. Because you won’t even be happy when you get to where you’re going if you don’t learn to love your imperfect, everyday life.”

Jordan Lee Dooley

When we are discontent, jealously and covetousness soon follows. We become self-centered. Instead of being happy for others when they receive good things, we feel envious. Continuing to think of and pursuing our wants and desires can even become an idol in our lives. It can make it difficult to give to others as well.

What We Must Remember

• Stuff is not what makes us satisfied. Solomon wrote a whole book (Ecclesiastes) on this and stated it in Ecclesiastes 5:10. Material possessions will not make us content. Oh, we may think they will – and they may for all of, oh, two seconds – but then there will be something else we want. And sadly, think of all the “famous” ones with the means to have whatever their heart desired, but who are depressed or have committed suicide or had multiple divorces…😢
• Wants are NOT needs. We may really need to reevaluate our “needs.” We may think we NEED new black shoes for church even though we have an old pair (aka, bought last year). Luke 12:22-28 beautifully shows us we do not have to worry about the Lord providing our needs. Where we may think we need a new(er) car or big(ger) house or whatever, God only promises our basic needs – food and clothing.
• All we have is a gift from God. Remember all the good things in our lives comes from God (James 1:17). Sometimes discontentment comes from the fact we think we deserve more than we have. Our sovereign God knows exactly what He has given us and what we need. Remember how God provided manna for the Israelites in the wilderness (Exodus 16:15)? They eventually grew discontent with it and started complaining and thinking about what they used to have (Numbers 11:1-9).

The cure for discontentment doesn’t come in getting more or having our wishes and dreams come true. It comes in a person, Jesus Christ. We have to know and believe and trust He is enough. We must accept His sovereign will no matter the situation realizing He will provide what we NEED. (He already died on the cross for our sins to give us the hope of eternal life.)

Remind yourself of His blessings. Realize compared to the rest of the world, we are the richest nation and have more than most even when we feel we are “poor.” We also may need to take a break from social media or whatever we find is giving us an extra push in the downhill slide of not thinking we have enough. What do you do when you find yourself discontent? 💕